Love is happening in the workplace more than ever according to Vault.com’s 2013 Office Romance Survey and most people are okay with it too!
According to the survey, 56% have had office romances—to varying degrees, 21% had casual coworkers-with-benefits situations, while 17% got a little more serious and 3% put a ring on it. 47% of respondents reported that they knew of married employees at the office engaging in romance at work. Even worse, 42% surveyed knew about out of town love trysts—so be careful! 35% of respondents said they had sex in the office and 5% got caught!
Employers really need to address love policies at work with employees, customers and vendors as well! Only 9% of survey respondents thought office romances were never acceptable! Yikes!!! 29% of those surveyed said anybody you work with is fair game. 29% said a colleague at another career level than you is probably not a great idea, while 25% said that somebody in your department or who you work on projects with is not a safe target.
Get this! Age does matter!
The 50+ age group of those surveyed, 71% have had office romances. And out of everyone who’s had an on-the-job love affair, 64% would do it again. Another study by Workplace Opinions, provides strong evidence of an age trend with 85% of 18-29 year olds indicating they would have a romantic relationship with a co-worker, while only 35% and 30% would engage in that behavior for the 30-26 year old and 47-66 year old age brackets, respectively. This survey clearly shows a trend among the younger generation of employees towards a greater comfort level with workplace romance. Even more shocking is that 40% of those 18-29 year olds would date their supervisors.
According to a Survey conducted by Society of Human Resources Management (SHRM), company policies addressing Love in the Workplace has increased. Moreover, those policies are a lot stricter today than they were in 2005, the last time SHRM conducted its Workplace Romance survey of HR professionals.
“People tend to look at workplace romance as a kind of fluffy topic, but for organizations, they’re taking them more seriously,” said Evren Esen, manager of SHRM’s Survey Research Center. “There only has to be one situation of a workplace romance gone bad to convince an HR department to adopt a policy.”
More than twice as many employers have written or verbal polices on office romances than in 2005, reported SHRM, which canvassed 380 HR professionals July 9-26, 2013. In 2005, 20 percent of respondents had such policies; in the most recent survey, 42 percent did.
“More and more companies have implemented policies because they realize they aren’t going to stop people from having romantic relationships,” said Christine Amalfe, an attorney in Gibbons P.C.’s litigation and employment and labor law departments. “They want to best protect the company from a claim of sexual harassment and ensure there’s no favoritism or conflict, which could hurt productivity and impact morale.”
How are workplace lovebirds usually discovered?
Typically, supervisors or HR professionals hear about them through office gossip, said 67 percent of respondents, or because the couple or their colleagues report the romance to the HR department, said 61 percent. One in four (25 percent) hears about the relationship from an anonymous tipster, and almost one in four (23 percent) learn of it from the couple’s business unit leader.
More than half of work romances (53 percent) are between employees in different departments, and nearly one-third (32 percent) are between workers of the same rank, the survey found. Nearly one in six (16 percent) can be classified as “affairs,” because one or both of the romantic partners already have spouses or significant others. Fewer than one in 10 (8 percent) happen between a supervisor and direct subordinate or between employees of significantly different rank, such as between a chief executive and a manager. Finally, more than half of HR professionals said the office romances at their organizations led to marriage or a long-term relationship.
Forbidden Love
Almost every respondent whose company had a workplace-romance policy (99 percent) said love matches between supervisors and subordinates are not allowed. That’s up from 80 percent in 2005 and 64 percent in SHRM’s 2001 Workplace Romance survey. Almost half of these policies (45 percent) forbid romances between employees of significantly different rank, a significant jump from 16 percent in 2005.
Typically, these prohibitions are designed to protect the company from sexual harassment lawsuits if the relationship ends and the subordinate claims the supervisor or higher-ranking colleague is making unwanted advances.
“Supervisor-subordinate romances are also problematic because they can spark complaints of favoritism. In fact, 40 percent of survey respondents said employees complained about favoritism between co-workers in a romantic relationship. Such perceptions can damage office morale, the survey authors wrote. “Romance can lead to gossip, hurt feelings, unfair advantages—the girlfriend gets promoted, while the one doing most of the work doesn’t—and so on,” one respondent said. “I have one friend who ended up marrying the president of the company where she worked. Other employees who didn’t dare complain directly to the president filled her ears with their grievances. This does not create a healthy work environment.”
Yet plenty of companies forbid intimate relationships even when there aren’t supervisory concerns. About one-third of organizations prohibit romances between employees who report to the same supervisor or between an employee and a client or customer, both up from 13 percent in 2005. Almost one in 10 (11 percent) also don’t allow romances between their employees and those of competitor organizations, up from 4 percent in 2005. And more than one in 10 (12 percent) won’t even allow workers in different departments to pair up.
Human Resources survey respondents said they worry that office romances will lead to public displays of affection; inappropriate sharing of confidential company information between romantic partners; inappropriate gossiping among co-workers; less productivity from the couple and their colleagues; and damage to the organization’s image because the pairing may be seen as unprofessional.
Unlucky in Love
What should organizations do if co-workers break an organization’s policy and pair up anyway?
Human Resources respondents said that in the past five years, they’ve resorted to one or more of these consequences: Transfer one employee to a different department (34 percent); send the couple to relationship counseling (32 percent); draw up a formal reprimand (21 percent); fire the offending workers (20 percent); remove a worker from a supervisory position (12 percent); suspend the employees (8 percent).
Despite concerns about office romances, more than eight in 10 respondents (81 percent) said their organization doesn’t train employees on how to manage workplace romances. And only 5 percent of organizations ask those in a romantic relationship to sign a “love contract,” which indicates that the relationship is consensual, that the pair won’t engage in favoritism and that neither will take legal action against the employer or each other if the relationship ends.
Workplace Dating Bans
Concerns about enforcement are further underscored by a recent article by SHRM, in which the author notes, “Such [workplace dating bans] policies may be all but unenforceable and can lead to severe problems for employers that invade their employee’s privacy.” Instead, the national HR organization suggests that employers focus their energies on a straightforward, enforceable sexual harassment policy and communicate the parameters of any such policy clearly to all employees.
Bottom line, organizations need to review your company polices and consider implementing a “Love Contract”. The “Love Contract” can potentially reduce the organizations risk of harassment and/or unfair treatment lawsuits. The dating employees sign a statement saying the relationship is consensual. That way if they breakup they can’t claim there was coercion! It protects the company from sexual harassment and discrimination risks.
Happy Valentines Day!
References:
- Forbidden Love: Workplace-Romance Policies Now Stricter, 9/24/2013 By Dana Wilkie
- Is Workplace Dating Really Off Limits? BY Chas Rampenthal. Inc.com http://www.inc.com/welcome.html?destination=http://www.inc.com/chas-rampenthal/dating-in-the-office-is-it-legal.html
- The Results Are In: Vault’s 2013 Office Romance Survey, February 14, 2013
- A Poor Dating Policy Could Break a Company’s Heart—and Wallet,
- www.workforce.com, Max Mehlick, February 7, 2013. http://www.workforce.com/articles/a-poor-dating-policy-could-break-a-company-s-heart-and-wallet
